By Health & Wellness Editor Kathy Whelan
Let’s face it. Many of us have complicated relationships with exercise. On one hand, we know how beneficial it is. On the other hand, we have a hard time making ourselves do it. Looking at those things separately can help us find our way out of this predicament.
The Benefits of Exercise
As we are told repeatedly, exercise is a boon to our health. It helps with weight regulation, mood improvement, stress management, muscle strength, physical endurance and sleep. It is said to lower the risk of, or help manage, health conditions such as stroke, metabolic syndrome, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, depression, anxiety and cancer. It can also, we hear, improve cognitive function.
Extrinsic Motivation
Reading a list like this, we’re apt to say, “I get it. I should exercise.” But that’s very different from “I want to” or “I will.” The fact is, we don’t like being told what to do, and that’s what “should” feels like. This isn’t a character flaw. Human beings simply have a fundamental need for autonomy, and being told what to do violates that need. “Shoulds” may motivate us to behave in a certain way for a while, but extrinsic motivation doesn’t usually last. A more enduring form of motivation considers our need for autonomy. When motivation is self-generated, we are more likely to succeed.
Intrinsic Motivation
Developing this kind of motivation requires looking closely at personal values, what matters most to us. This isn’t as easy as it sounds. When we think of values, we often think of what Dr. John DeMartini calls “social idealisms” like honesty, integrity, fairness and hard work. But these are not as much personal values as “shoulds” we have internalized about certain ways of thinking and behaving.
To uncover our true core values, we need to ask ourselves what we love to do, what we treasure most in life, what we choose to spend our time, energy and money on. This might involve relationships, work, hobbies, sports, travel, learning, teaching or any number of other things. These are not what someone else has chosen for us but rather what inspires us and fills us with vitality and enthusiasm.
We can uncover these personal values in relation to our health by asking ourselves “What do I want my health for?” and “Why is my health important to me?” Someone who aspires to be a teacher, a nurse or a chef might want to be healthy enough to spend long hours standing up. Someone else might want to engage in a favorite sport for years to come. Others might want to be healthy to be active with children or travel the world.
Bringing these personal values to the forefront casts current behaviors in a new light, making it easier to see inconsistencies between what is most important to us and habits that don’t support our values. This helps us highlight the costs of continuing to engage in those habits. It’s no longer “You should lose weight to lower your risk of heart disease” but rather “If I don’t lose weight, I may not be healthy enough to play with my grandkids.” Motivation becomes personal and much more powerful.
Exercise Duration
Confusion sometimes arises as to what amount of exercise suffices, and this can be a stumbling block. Although intended to be helpful, guidelines that specify the duration and intensity of exercise can be understood as rigid criteria. And that can lead to all-or-nothing thinking: “I can’t meet that goal today, so I won’t do anything.” That attitude not only eliminates short bouts of exercise but also erodes self-respect and self-confidence and can lead to avoiding exercise altogether.
The latest edition of the Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans attempts to address this issue. While still recommending adults get at least 150 minutes per week of moderately intense aerobic exercise and two sessions of muscle-strengthening activities, these newer guidelines eliminate an earlier requirement that physical activity occur in bouts of at least 10 minutes, acknowledging that even short episodes of physical activity are beneficial: “Some activity is better than none.” Showing up in a small way beats not showing up at all.
What Counts?
Even with greater latitude in terms of duration, an aversion to exercise can develop because of what is perceived as constituting exercise. I often hear this: “I’ve never found a kind of exercise I like.” That statement usually reflects a distaste for the kinds of equipment found in gyms: dumbbells and kettlebells, treadmills and other machines.
The reaction is often quite different when it comes to activities like walking with a friend, dancing, gardening, leaf raking or other forms of movement that seem more natural or purposeful. And guess what? It all counts. Home workouts using body weight or simple resistance bands are effective, too.
Flexibility Leads to Consistency
Planning is useful. Looking ahead at an upcoming week helps us figure out what kinds of exercise will work best on what days. Considering what could get in the way of our plans will help us get around those barriers. If the calendar looks impossibly busy, we can ask ourselves what we could remove from our schedule before trying to include something else.
And yet, as 18th century Scottish poet Robert Burns observed, the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Life is complicated, and each day presents its own, sometimes unanticipated challenges. Even with a carefully laid plan, we may not be able to follow through.
This is where flexibility comes in. Like a tree trunk that bends in a stiff wind without breaking, being able to adapt our routines to changing circumstances will preserve our momentum. Elastic Habits author Stephen Guise calls flexibility a “superpower.” No time for a long walk because something urgent comes up? That might be a time for walking around during phone calls, an exercise “snack” filling in for a whole meal.
Flexibility is also useful when our bodies tell us to do something different than what we’d planned. When feeling tired or achy, we can trade a strengthening day for a stretching day. Doing so will preserve the habit of daily movement.
Making exercise personal and flexible in these ways changes “I should” into “I want to” and “I will” and enables us to experience the many health benefits of exercise. As a National Board Certified Health & Wellness Coach, I am here to help you create a plan.
Kathy Whelan left a successful Wall Street legal career when she became aware of the hazards posed by a lifestyle of overwork and lack of self-care. Having prioritized health earlier in her life and in raising her family, Kathy eventually returned to her undergraduate alma mater, Duke University, to become a certified Integrative Health Coach, with additional training in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction. She later became a National Board Certified Health & Wellness Coach (NBC-HWC). Kathy’s coaching has its roots in the neuroscience of behavior change. She calls it the missing link between individuals and the health care system. You can learn more about Kathy and her work at www.whelanwellness.com and view her newsletter on Substack at https://whelank.substack.com.